Friday, January 9, 2009

Rapper's Delight

I'm back in Newcastle. This jet lag was horrendous. Although I found no time to sleep on the 15 hours I was in the air, I made some crazy play lists. I'll put one up later.
My body still thinks it's 9 o'clock...when it's almost 3 am. CRAP!
School is back in session in Monday, and I couldn't be less excited. I have gone out the past couple of nights just to be social, and stay out of the house I'll be in for the next 5 months avoiding the library.

There were a few things that made the trip here easier. I have a place to live, I know my way around, I have friends here who greeted me with hugs and coffee, and I actually missed them.
I still can't help but have my doubts about medical school, as the word "forever" is starting to sink in....and my biological clock ticks on. Do I want a family? I have friends that are married with kids, and the only thing that I am guaranteed is 3 1/2 solid years of studying with the same group of people that are more familial then marriage material. I am from the south, just not that "southern".
Well...I need to take more advantage of my location. How many people can hop on a plane to Paris for the weekend? And yes, I'm doing this in three weeks. The Madrid to see my cousin very soon, I need a strong dose of optimism. Is this considered self-medicating?
I just remember being on the beach with Sam and Rachael, in the heat with paint and canvas, not a care in the world. I like being care-free and warm, is that so much to ask? So, we ran to a "Miami bar" with the coolest drinks I've ever seen and I completely let myself go on the dance floor. I was dancing until my feet were so cramped that standing was a challenge. Did I mention they played early 90s rap? ODB and I had a wonderful evening together.

Saturday, January 3, 2009


Happy New Year. Yeah, no exclammations. I am so sick of flying, and I have to pull another 20 hour plane ride out to jolly 'ol England in 3 days. I am excited to go back, but the work load is looming.
I feel really jaded after my trip to Florida. I was so stoked to surf, and mother nature was against me from the start. My plane was delayed over 24 hours, so my Friday night out with Jessica was destroyed. After that, I managed a cool 5 hours of sleep only to trekk back out to the airport for an early morining jaunt down south.
Then I landed. I don't know what it is about having someone meet you when you walk off the plane, but it makes you feel better. Jess was running a little behind to I grabbed my bags and met her curbside. As soon as she got out of the car, I felt like bawling. I had finally made it. Finally.
The weather was glorious. I'll never get a trip like that again. The heat was perfect enough for bathing suits and sun bathing, although Lake Atlantic allowed 1 1/2 feet of surf...not gnarly at all. Even after the cold front moved in, the waves were not giving me anything to work.
Bonding with Jess was fantastic. We ran around the Towns Center, and just caught up on life. She's in law school and I'm in med school, being friends since second grade has kept us closer with the sparse conversations about our stressed out life styles. For this I am greatful.
The majority of Saturday night was lost to me. I was up 23 hours, combining the stress of traveling and booze...well it knocked out the majority of my Sunday. Due to miscommunication, I cancelled my trip to Gainesville and was unable to contact Carolyn. Darling, I will see you in May! Promise!
I learned who my true friends were, and I made some of my newer friends integral in my life. Sam and Rachael played in the sun with fingerpaint all day with me while Jess was at work. We bonded over yoga, the ocean, and salsa! Corey and Caleb met us at Paco's and we sauntered around the beach and headed over to Lauren's apartment. I saw a bunch of my old buddies from UF and felt the urge to fill another void: ANGIE'S! I got to catch up with Corey over my epic fail of a Saturday night, and enjoy the best food Jax beach has to offer. I was finally at home.
Full of sand and Peruvian sauce, Sam and I ran around Jax and framed pictures, grabbed food...Omar and Jatin(much to his unwant) pulled me out of PVB and after an errand I ended up getting cavity searched at the Ritz. Awesome. I really hate american bars with a passion. The drunks are worse, I always get accused of being 14, and they let you smoke inside. GROSS. I spent the night sober and chatted it up with some Stanton/UF grads that were a few years ahead of me. We spent the night reliving some amazing/embarrassing memories, and I got to see Nader and Steph for the first time after getting married! After they headed to Lynch's, I just sat around with Omar/Jatin/Shelton/Bryce/Christine and just talked.
The next evening was nice and calm. Brandon picked me up and took me to see The Valkyrie with my boys. I finally saw John and Mason for more than two seconds and I met Tony! The movie was great, and I slept really great that night with all the windows opened in Jess's room. It's the little things.
Sarah drove up from Gainesville to see me and we walked the beach for a few hours and sipped a cocktail. I miss her so much. She is so steady in my life.
NYE 2008. Could not have been better. I can't imagine a situation where I was happier, more in control of myself, and just....ready. For everything.
Reverse culture shock is horrible. You start replacing fabulous goodbye memories, with breezy hellos....I learned what it meant to say "I wish you never changed."
Don't get me wrong, I loved my trip. I just don't love everything I learned from it. I am really lucky to be able to pack up my bags and be myself. I miss my friends, but I feel the majority of my dynamic friendships....well they aren't the same anymore. A handful will always be there for me, but my next visit to Florida won't be for quite sometime. Probably no sooner than 2 years from now. I can only stand having my heart stomped on so many times a decade.
Resolutions? HA! Never.
"I felt you in my legs/Before I even met you/And when I laid beside you/For the first timeI told youI feel you in my heart,/And I don't even know you/Now we're saying/Bye, bye, bye/Flew home,/Back to where we met/Stayed inside/I was so upset/Cooked up a plan,/So good except/I was all alone"